How I laugh now...

Remember that first crush? Remember that first kiss? Remember that first heartbreak? Remember crying to your mom and saying over and over again "I'M NEVER GOING TO FIND SOMEONE LIKE THAT AGAIN! NEVER! HE WAS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE, MOM! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" and then you curled up in a ball for like a week and started listening to all those sad love songs that you recorded from the radio or started writing sad love poems?

Yeah, I remember, because that was me in middle school, junior high, and high school. When I look back (and I look back during the most random moments) I blush because I'm afraid that someone can see my mind and see all those hilarious dramatic moments. Oh my god, I can't believe what a drama queen I was. I could have won an Oscar, Emmy, and a MTV Movie award. I'm sure of it.

Well, anyways, as I look back at all my experiences, which I can remember, I want to laugh. I want to crawl into a ball from how embarrassing I used to think. Remembering all that drama in high school, fighting for the attention of the popular girls AND the popular boys, trying to just "fit in" makes me realize that I wasted some valuable time and I wish so hard somebody could have told me. I'm sure my mom told me about it, but mom didn't know anything, or so I'd used to think that. Hahaha, oh how stupid I was. And then facebook was born and all of sudden you could trace back all of your "ex-boyfriends" "best friends" "popular girls and boys "enemies" and believe me....I can't believe I tried so hard to be part of these people lives.

Ex-boyfriends became losers, best friends forgot about their "best friends", the popular girls got knocked up at very young age or got fat from all the drinking, popular boys got other girls knocked up and/or also got fat, and enemies became people who I misjudged and wished I could be friends with now.

If you are in junior high or high school right now. Listen to people who've been there before. The world does not end when a boyfriend breaks up with you, believe me, it's for the better. The world does not end because the popular girls don't acknowledge you, believe me, they will end up wishing they had your life now. The world does not end when your friend doesn't want to be your friend anymore, believe me, you are gonna have a hundred more.

Ugh, I just remembered when I saw my "first crush" kissing Daisy, my frenemy from junior high and I thought the world was shaking and I cried so hard that I couldn't see my mom standing five feet from me. Aaaaand, I just checked his profile pic. He's fat. LOL! Oh gosh.

You know what, even though I wish I could have saved some tears and headaches from all the head banging I did on the walls, I'm glad that I got to go through some experiences. I definitely wouldn't be me if it weren't for them. You live and grow.

♫♪☺♥☻☼♫♪